Notes from an inexperienced chili taster named frank: "recently i was honored to be selected, as an "outstanding famous celebrity in texas", to be a judge at a chilli cook-off, because no one else wanted to do it. judge two: a beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of red peppers. frank: this has got to be a joke.
Frank: "recently, i was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. the original person called in sick at the last moment and i happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the coors light truck, when the call came in.
The contestant seemed offended when i told her that her chili had given me brain damage. sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly from a pitcher onto it. it really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming.